I know I know, this shit is getting old, try to hold back from throwing that midget you hate at the variety store, down the stairs, but as expected, Ashlee Simpson married Pete Wentz at her parents’ Encino home on Saturday.
Us Magazine says:
Approximately 150 guests gathered beneath white tents erected on the Simpson property to witness the nondenominational ceremony which was officiated by Joe Simpson himself. Guests included Nicole Richie, who wore a long flowing purple dress, and Joel Madden. Inside the tents the decor was goth rocker: black rugs, white couches with red pillows, black chandeliers and lots of red roses. The four months pregnant bride wore a Monique Lhuillier dress and a diamond necklace with matching earrings by Neil Lane. Wentz wore a Dior Homme tuxedo. The four months pregnant bride wore a Monique Lhuillier dress and a diamond necklace with matching earrings. Wentz wore a Dior Homme tuxedo. At the request of the couple, all of the guests wore dark colors, such as blue, black or grey. Big sis and maid of honor Jessica Simpson brought Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo as her date amidst a week of breakup reports. On Friday, a source told Us that “Joe called Tony and asked him to show support for the wedding.”.
The shit above, I can care less. I hope he cries himself to sleep while Ashlee kicks him in the ball repeatedly, there as worthless as Ajax sitting on your kitchen counter. I am bored today and nothing good has came out. So onto Ashlee Simpson breasts. Because that is the only thing, that really important here in this article. So I give you her breasts! Tadaaa..
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Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are gonna get married next week! Mofos do not waste anytime..Shit shes pregnant, shit lets get married…Wait! Lets get married next week…Oh needs a prenuptial not me! Pete Wentz is slyest mofo to walk the earth..Like Iron Man!
Hollyscoop reports:
A source close to the couple, “The wedding invitations have been sent out, its taking place the weekend of May 16. The location will not be revealed until the day of the wedding but guests are told it will be an hour drive from Los Angeles.” Our source also confirmed that Ashlee is 100% pregnant. Papa Joe is probably busy selling off the wedding info and pictures as we speak so expect to see it in the tabloids Memorial weekend.
Joe Simpson is probably the coolest dad in the world. Not only does he sell the photo rights to his daughter’s unborn child but to her wedding as well. He like a male version of Dina Lohan..The Simpsons and the Lohan should go into business together and fuck each other royally. Now that show I would tune in for..Everyweek…The redheads versus the blondes…hmmmm.
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According to the planets of emo gayness, Pete Wentz just might have scored himself a Jessica Simpson clone, with breasts and smile to go with this happy meal. Jeez where did Ashlee Simpson breasts just come from. I know the white v-neck shirts are in, but dammmm..I didn’t know the girl was giving Jess a run for her money. Maybe it because shes preggo, which still hasn’t been confirmed or denied…Ill take boobies for four dollars, Alex!
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I am Pete Wentz, I am cool. I dress like the dark of night, more emo then your mom. And I bang the one of the hottest girls on the planet while crying. See life cant get any better then this. Too bad hes not be able to hook up with fifteen years old anymore. No more Miley Cyrus action for him. Hes stuck with the faking singing nose redhead until his eyeliner goes.
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Us Magazine breaks the balls that Ashlee Simpson is pregnant. Just last week it was announced that Ashlee is engaged. What a coincidence!
The singer, 23, is expecting her first child with fiancé Pete Wentz, 28. Simpson and the Fall Out Boy frontman announced their engagement Wednesday. “We are thrilled to confirm their engagement and congratulate this happy couple,” a spokesperson for the couple told Us. “Beyond that there is nothing to say.” Simpson’s rep had no comment.
So she’s pregnant. That’s why the rushed wedding. Stuff like this is why you have to be careful. Always use protection, and if you’re like me, you boil people before you sleep with them. You can never be too careful of diseases!
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Like most lead singles, Touch My Body, Mariah Carey’s first single off her new album, E=MC2, was released prior to the album’s official launch date of April 15th, but several more tracks have been suspiciously leaked online. Why, who hatched this diabolical scheme?
Ashlee Simpson, of course. KBS Radio says:
Industry insiders believe Ashlee Simpson’s camp may be responsible for leaking songs off Mariah Carey’s new album in hopes of it creating less competition for the 23-year-old, whose album drops a week after the record-setting “diva.” A source told MSNBC, “Joe Simpson has every right to be nervous about Ashlee going up against Mariah. They are backed into a corner with this release date since they already changed it once. Their only option in fighting the Mariah machine would be to create a way to make the album’s release less newsworthy.”…Simpson’s Bittersweet World was originally set to be released in late 2007, but at the last minute was pushed back to April 22, 2008.”
Ashlee Simpson’s album must be coming out like the Holy Bible. I mean has she ever had a hit single and if she did I dont remember it at all. I sounds like this is bullshit. But its good bullshit nevertheless, sometimes you have to stand in aw of the greatest bullshit story ever told. The Bible. Funny how Ashlee can keep a man, Jessica not really.
UPDATE: Please insert dick into Ashlee’s mouth to watch it grow.
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