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It seems like every time Jennifer Aniston does an interview she spends half her time talking about Brad Pitt and how she doesn’t think about Brad Pitt anymore. Now I date John Mayer. Well, not anymore. E! says:
A source says that the pair’s on-again, off-again relationship may have ended when Aniston returned from overseas, where she was promoting Marley & Me. She returned sometime within the last week. “He broke up with her when she got back from her European tour,” the source said.
John Mayer is the king, hes a smart dude. He gets in at the right time. Gets some anal sex, and then knows when to bail, and then hes onto hot chick number 2939239279372. Lets see he banged Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, Minka Kelly, the guy is a goddess, his cock must rule!
So basically I was staying at the Mandarin Hotel and I went on my little patio and I looked down and saw John Mayer and Jennifer Aniston at the pool, peeping someone else’s action. So I took my 10 foot long camera and pointed downward and I got these killer shots of pictures, John checking out hot chicks and Jennifers hot ass. I actually like Jen and Brad as a couple better. Then all the shit going on. But John Mayer is my brotha we go way back, so keep banging John. Bang them all!
Jennifer Aniston in pool with John Mayer at Mandarin Oriental Hotel in Miami Beach…That fucking lucky ass bastard! To think he went near the same high school I did, he never got the chicks. And he gets all famous and the chicks come out of left field. John Mayer has the same credo as me, I only hook up with insanely hot chicks. But because anything less would not be worth it. Better to wait and get the best, then to settle for that fat chick at the convenience store offering you a blow job for free..
UPDATE: Found even more pictures of John Mayer infecting Jennifer Aniston with herpes. I know its a sad thing but some douchebag has to do it. Might as well be John!!
WTF! Its movie day here at Dickism…I am sick of this movie shit, no more movies…But I saw this skit how John Mayer got together with the folks over at FunnyOrDie.com to make a video that takes us behind the scenes of his songwriting process. Ingenious I know. John Mayer is one funny mofo so now I gave him mad props not only for banging all the women in my dreams, but for being the coolest guy to make something. He’s able to score a chick like Jennifer Aniston and shes able to listen to his shit….Ohh btw…Kristen Bell is in it towards the end..Smokin! Just in case you couldn’t read the title…
NOTE: John Mayer walks by a hot chick wearing a body is a wonderland t shirt no less, takes her sandwich out of her hand, takes a bite, then throws it on the ground! Owned!!
So finally I found pictures that seem worthy to put up of Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer sunbathing together in Miami Beach. It must be hard being famous and having unlimited amounts of money and of course getting to bang every hot chick that comes your way..I think they are just friends and not exactly banging, but I could be wrong as always. John usually likes them younger and dumber. And Jen is a bit out of his league…lol
