Scarlett Johansson | Dickism | The Guys Guide To Celebrity Gossip

Scarlett Johansson In ‘Anywhere I Lay My Breasts’

Tuesday April 29 2008

On May 20, 2008, Scarlett Johansson will debut as a vocalist on her first album Anywhere I Lay My Head, with cover versions of Tom Waits songs featuring vocals from David Bowie. In the summer of 2007, Johansson spent about a month in Maurice, Louisiana recording an album at Dockside Studio, a rural 12 acre complex. The album is to consist of one original song and ten cover versions of Tom Waits songs. She should stick to movies, I think her breasts sell more movies, then her voice. If Ryan Reynolds doesn’t marry her I will. I am next in line.

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Emma Watson Is In….Scarlett Johansson Is Out

Friday April 18 2008

Scarlett Johansson is only 5 years older than Emma Watson (they’re 18 and 23, respectively), but Scarlett looks way way older. Scarlett has aged like my grandmother, she’s lived 10 lifetimes in just a few years. The point to all this being is that Scarlett was dumped from a movie because she looked too old, and replaced by Hermione Granger. Sleuters says…

“Harry Potter” heroine Emma Watson is attached to star in the period romance “Napoleon and Betsy,” replacing Scarlett Johansson who was deemed too old for the role.
Watson, 18, will play Betsy Balcombe, a young, impetuous noblewoman trapped on the isolated British island of St. Helena who falls in love with Napoleon, who has been exiled there.

If I were Scarlett, I wouldn’t put up with this crap, but then I’m a adventurous manwhore who lives for a good fight. I have my denim jean jacket and rolled up cigarettes in my shoulder. I invented cool. Beware.

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Win A Date With Scarlett Johansson And Stalk Her

Monday March 3 2008

Hey all you Scarlett Johansson stalkers out there, here’s your chance to get up close and personal with the object of your obsession. If you’ve got some extra cash lying around, you might want to head over to EBay, and start bidding to be Scarlett Johansson’s date to the June 2009 premiere of her movie He’s Just Not That Into You. Though, I wouldn’t really call it a date, and neither did Scarlett, even though Page Six did. Here’s what they wrote.

Of course, there is a problem with Page Six’s report. You won’t actually be Scarlett’s date. The auction is for two passes to the premiere, and while you get to meet Scarlett, there is absolutely no way that you will be spending the entire evening with her. Make sure to read the fine print on the auction page:

Q: How long will the meet and greet last?
A: There is no set amount of time but it is estimated to be a brief visit due to Scarlett’s schedule that evening.

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Scarlett Johansson Hosts Louis Vuitton “Love” Party

Friday May 4 2007

Scarlett Johansson at the Louis Vuitton “Love” party yesterday helping them launch their LOVE line. Well she seems to be walking around with every old guy possible. Too bad none of them got caught staring at her boobies. She seemed to cover up at this event. But I like it better when her tits are hanging out and shes jumping up and down.

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Scarlett Johansson Boobies Show Up At Saturday Night Live

Monday April 23 2007

Scarlett Johansson hosted Saturday Night Live this past weekend, and all I kept doing is staring at her boobies. I think next time instead of wearing a black dress. To have her wear a wet t-shirt so we can get more of her boobs. Because it doesn’t matter what she says or what shes doing. As long as her boobs are clear and visible the whole planet will be watching.

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